tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-186580622024-03-23T13:12:34.095-05:00Cranky PutzCrankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.comBlogger513125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-49274875942887074382013-03-01T08:23:00.003-06:002013-03-01T08:23:57.495-06:00Live Your Life Like You're Playing Mas
After years of dreaming about it, I finally crossed out a bucket list item and played mas in Trinidad. The experience was revolutionizing. First off it never occurred to me that it could be socially acceptable to be so wotless for an extended period of time. Second I was uberly impressed by my apparently lack of need for sleep, there were days where I slept a less than 3 hours and woke up Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-90297406555794744502012-01-03T19:26:00.000-06:002012-01-03T19:26:55.144-06:00The way you place my towelsI am starting to notice a correlation between how a man treats my home with the longevity of the relationship.
Historically the ones who never made the bed.....turned out to be those on their way out.
Most recently, I noticed that the fella in question never bothered to place my hand towels back on the rack properly. I should clarify that I don't have lacy fancy matching towel sets, just Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-30289138337019693232011-01-21T11:26:00.001-06:002011-01-21T11:26:31.225-06:00No Strings Attached
So there’s a new movie coming out called “No Strings Attached.” I was watching an interview with the director of the movie, who claimed that the theme was indicative of my generations changed views towards sex.
As a single girl at first I was sort of offended. I thought back to the many years I strove so hard to keep the number down to my one hand. Most girls are raised with Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-47826355276522255352011-01-19T14:46:00.000-06:002011-01-19T14:46:39.837-06:00Vanity Fair does this lovely Proust Questionnaire, since I don’t see them knocking on my door anytime soon, here are my answers:
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Laughing so hard with the people you love, adore and respect, that you pee a little, and the sun is shining directly in my face.
What is your greatest fear?
That despite my art teacher’s great warning 15 years ago in my Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-81032677231209308172011-01-16T18:59:00.000-06:002011-01-16T18:59:30.048-06:00There's a local fashion show in Toronto that does some fabulous and fun things on Fridays. This friday I had the pleasure of attending with a friend.
Part of the show is a makeover. As the producers went through the rows of women who had their hands up, they noticed yours truly bouncing in her seat. When asked what my opinion of makeovers are, I said, "Well its just hair, it grows back right?Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-42121204977608192732011-01-13T15:14:00.000-06:002011-01-13T15:14:16.054-06:002011There is a Drake song that goes a little something like this,
“Don't ever forget the moment You began to doubt
Transitioning from fitting in to standing out.”
It’s 2011. And I’ve had a great start. The year ended in Acapulco, celebrating my birthday with some dear friends and many strangers. New Years was all fireworks from a cliff, picturesque and gorgeous. And then I came back and threw Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-17656805879158186272010-11-24T20:43:00.003-06:002011-01-13T15:07:27.413-06:00This past year has been my learning year. It's like God decided this is the year I would learn my ass off. Learn the limits of friendship, happiness and love. And then Learn the limitlessness of friendship, happiness and love. I am a firm believer in the freedom of crazy.Everyone needs a little safe place to be a little crazy, a little cranky, a little putzy.This has been my safe place for Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-33024767205700591412010-09-21T09:40:00.004-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.416-06:00Return of the CrankyMy dearest Would Be,It’s finally here. The big 3O. Years ago, in Dubai, my friend Jen and I were sitting in a parking lot (our equivalent to a park) having a serious conversation about life. Jen said that 30 was the IT year, the year that really determined whether your life was going to soar, or stagnate by the pre determination of birth. So here I am, 3 months till the big 30, reviewing the Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-58015328605200545352010-09-07T21:57:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.418-06:00I haven't done one of these in a while:Dracs: CP, Weh yuh?CP: HereDracs: Here, weh, gurlll……Aye Miss Yuh, Aye Need Yuh, Aye think of yuh so I holla…..CP: Uh HuhDracs: So come have a bit with meh and small tingCP: OkDracs: Aye be there in two minutes, get readddyyyyyCP: I need tenDracs: Aye love yuh the way Yuse is, Just come down naah, don’t make meh wait….CP: (Thinks of all the times she waited, and proceeds to prod around Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-51463053788416255742010-09-07T10:15:00.002-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.421-06:00Cottage-ing is synonymous for adult sleepovers. I spent this weekend with 25 friends and 4 kids under the age of 2 in a mansion cottage. The cottage itself was lovely, with slanted roofs, and little hiding places. The weather was terrible, but the food, the alcohol, the feeling of beating all the felas at poker, was amazing.I’ve come back at least 5 pounds heavier. Which has me thinking that Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-25490010262742948192010-08-30T08:01:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.426-06:00AsmaI’ve hung out with Dubya’s friends and this weekend since I was busy with a friend’s bbq, I invited him along to meet some of my friends. At first he was all gung ho. Then he asked if he could bring his friends (normal request, however given that my friend had just spent an hour ranting to me about people inviting people he didn’t know, I had to say no to the request.) Then he magically Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-86297792284585572462010-08-26T14:20:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.429-06:00Dubya (aka Mr. W-thanks Jumbs)Friend: How long do you think people should know each other before getting married?Dubya (enthusiastically): 2 yearsCP: 7, unless it’s a war time situationCrankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-1670392793953056992010-08-24T15:51:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.431-06:00Tuesday thoughts:My cube neighbor is driving me crazy. First off she’s a consummate phone complainer. 80% of her job appears to be calling up various vendors for her personal life to complain about something. The conversations always go the same, she starts off stingingly nice, then her voice gets whinny, and then it switches to downright pretend nice but obviously bitchy. Second she has a troublesome fella Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-7657296917849450252010-08-16T10:19:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.434-06:00Monday thoughtsSummer is almost over. I know this because I got a cold this weekend…..change in temperature always gets me a cold. Draconian has found God. I get emails now quoting scripture. Mr. Sales is super sweet. I am really enjoying this new found drama free relationship.Work is going well. I still feel a bit like a child with divorcing parents, with one boss wanting me to travel and the other (whoCrankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-17811811484833679332010-08-11T15:48:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.436-06:00Mr. SalesWhen you’re young-er you tend to choose fellas based on good looks and general impressions on ‘coolness.’ Then you grow up and realize the good looking fellas went bald before 30 and the ‘cool’ fellas never really grow up and tend to live pay cheque to pay cheque.So you then come up with new criteria for falling in love. If you’re in HR, you come up with the 4 C’s:-Character-Consistency-Care Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-44703201001070088712010-08-06T14:13:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.439-06:00Single Tax-VentAs you get older being single is a great liability.There are the group outings. The couples usually plan these, and they entice you to come. And You book early and pay up.And then 3 weeks before you go, the schedule comes out and somehow the couples and couples with kids who booked decided to come last Wednesday get the rooms, and the ‘singles’ who booked first are relegated to sleeping Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-75245718721858978342010-07-26T10:03:00.002-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.441-06:00To the Society of Romantics and Misled Hopefuls,Lately I have had the great joy of seeing Draconian with his new girlfriend on two separate occasions. She’s young, perky, exotic and beautiful. Karma, dear society, is a fat ole bitch. I have also had the joy on going on dates, many, many, many dates.Bachelor #1: is in Sales, a gentleman, but I’m not sure I felt the spark, however he has been Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-35883085177558260142010-07-21T08:47:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.443-06:00Thoughts on a rather depressing Wednesday:If the first time you go out with a dude and he suggests that you help him shop for jeans as part of your outing, is it really a date, or is he just looking for a free personal shopper?Dating should be fun: but frankly realizing how many men in this world I am not compelled by, is plain ole depressingThe person you once loved walks by you on the street (after turning around to make sure it was Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-67571582903061647082010-07-12T16:54:00.002-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.445-06:00Do you ever hear a song and it reminds you of the most fun day in your life? This mix has me remembering bumpin and grinding Friday nights at the Guvernment. Then coming out at 4 am with my then besties, half naked, as was the tradition in those days and I had the body to pull it off,) only to find our car nowhere in sight. My friend immediately starts to cry, the other two look equally upset, Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-73904297489774157412010-07-06T19:19:00.003-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.448-06:00Why I love Summer in Toronto: When it’s hot the city sets up emergency cooling centers. They hand out water and tell people how to stay cool. Where else in the world does that happen?The festivals: All over Toronto, someone is celebrating something, whether its their teams soccer win, tasty Thursdays, salsa or some obscure African festival…..if it exists someone in Toronto is celebrating itGayCrankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-40488179859205893222010-07-01T19:56:00.003-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.451-06:00Really Interesting how when your not into someone you can see the future, and see all the things that could go wrong because of your differences. But if your into someone all you see is them.Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-30677311580169790632010-06-27T20:16:00.001-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.460-06:00"Love Oh Love,Stop making a Fool of Me."Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-50229408901974173122010-06-24T08:55:00.002-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.462-06:00Every now and then a restlessness comes over me.And I can’t concentrate.And the world gets a little dull.And my mind wanders into a space of emptiness.And I begin to search; to stare outside the window, seeing nothing; to look into people as they walk past, trying to imagine their inner most fears; to pick up a book, only to have to put it down; to read a poem, only to find myself unsatisfied by Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-35198499828171085632010-06-22T09:22:00.002-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.465-06:00On attractionAttraction is a strange phenomenon.My question: Is it in our control who we are attracted to?Or is all we have control over: whether or not we act on the attraction?Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18658062.post-85241600256341511462010-06-15T16:46:00.004-05:002011-01-13T15:07:27.467-06:00My Dearest Would Be, Every now and then an imposter appears. He says all the sweet things I expect you will say. He does all the sweet things I expect you will do. He seems suspiciously good……too good. Eventually though he fucks up. He goes too far. He says something stupid like, ‘I bought a condo and I was waiting to buy a couch, till I got you back.’ Or “I love you, you’re the one for me,Crankyputzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17948774650181520591noreply@blogger.com4