On Minding the Yute

I was invited to attend a summer intern orientation this morning. I thought I would casually drop in, smile, and then skip out to attend another meeting.

Only I get to floor and I am accosted by thirty versions of me, all attired in their best. I say they were versions of me, because I look miraculously young for my age. (For instance the kiss a$$ who suckered me into buying an overpriced nail buffer purported to be made out of dead sea materials, claimed I looked eighteen….) At first they thought I was one of them. When I introduced myself as part of the company, they eyed me suspiciously, until one of them said, “Oh you were a summer intern last year?”

I usher them into the meeting room and we wait, thirty mini-me’s and me.

Eventually it dawns on me that no one else is coming, or at least not for a while. I have no game plan; after all I wasn’t even supposed to be there. But the snazzy HR in me comes out, and I decide to do a quick let’s go around the room, introduce ourselves time killer. It was sort of cute, all of them concentrating really hard trying to remember their areas of work.

Suddenly the into/ice breaker is finished and again silence. Twenty minutes in and no one has shown up. So I decide, Oh what the hell, let’s give them a little spiel. Which went well, until the natural smart ass of the group, decided to pipe in a smart A$$ comment about not realizing he was down town. I get a little bitchy with smart A$$ in groups. I cut the poor kid down in the sweetest way possible, and for the rest of time kept making references to his ‘great sense of direction. You must nip insolence in the bud, before it spreads….

One of the little boys was actually very very attractive. He was in his last year of school. Is it wrong to covet a borderline adult??

Ps. My nails look lovely, thank you for asking.