Tuesday, May 08, 2007

On Minding the Yute

I was invited to attend a summer intern orientation this morning. I thought I would casually drop in, smile, and then skip out to attend another meeting.

Only I get to floor and I am accosted by thirty versions of me, all attired in their best. I say they were versions of me, because I look miraculously young for my age. (For instance the kiss a$$ who suckered me into buying an overpriced nail buffer purported to be made out of dead sea materials, claimed I looked eighteen….) At first they thought I was one of them. When I introduced myself as part of the company, they eyed me suspiciously, until one of them said, “Oh you were a summer intern last year?”

I usher them into the meeting room and we wait, thirty mini-me’s and me.

Eventually it dawns on me that no one else is coming, or at least not for a while. I have no game plan; after all I wasn’t even supposed to be there. But the snazzy HR in me comes out, and I decide to do a quick let’s go around the room, introduce ourselves time killer. It was sort of cute, all of them concentrating really hard trying to remember their areas of work.

Suddenly the into/ice breaker is finished and again silence. Twenty minutes in and no one has shown up. So I decide, Oh what the hell, let’s give them a little spiel. Which went well, until the natural smart ass of the group, decided to pipe in a smart A$$ comment about not realizing he was down town. I get a little bitchy with smart A$$ in groups. I cut the poor kid down in the sweetest way possible, and for the rest of time kept making references to his ‘great sense of direction. You must nip insolence in the bud, before it spreads….

One of the little boys was actually very very attractive. He was in his last year of school. Is it wrong to covet a borderline adult??

Ps. My nails look lovely, thank you for asking.

21 comments:

scratchie said...

Hope you weren't too hard on him. The drawbacks of being young. Who knows maybe he liked you and just had to be seen. No borderline adult business roun' 'ere. lol

Jdid said...

lol
you do look young though but i wouldnt peg you for an intern

lol that dead sea material person got to you too. they are good, they got to everyone in my family except me so far

Crankyputz said...

Jdid: They coming for you, with their youth defying loofas......I give them your number....Your welcome!

Leon said...

Gotta put those kids in their place. And no, it's not wrong to covet a young adult.

Abeni said...

lol..no law against appreciating CP

bitsandgiggles said...

I think being an a$$ is the young adult equivalent of smacking you over the head on the playground ;-)

Crankyputz said...

B&G: See I knew you would put a spin on it!

SimplEnigma said...

I got suckered into buying the EXACT same Dead Sea package at the Manhattan Mall. $30. Then I saw it in Century 21 for $15. The salesguy really laid it on thick. Even told us he was from the region and would take us back there for a tour. Bastard.

20 is the new 30...

Lene said...

you had to show him who wears the pants. would have underminded your authority and all of that... damn rabblerouser

Crankyputz said...

SE: I got the special price of $20.00...shhh don't tell anybody i was repeatedly reminded, and was also offered a tour of the dead sea.....but really my nails do look fab....

Stephen Bess said...

Yes, these kids need direction and instruction on how to conduct themselves. So, keep nipping them in the bud. Well, unless they're underaged. :)

Miz JJ said...

Lol look at your coveting the interns. It all sounds very familiar....

GC (God's Child) said...

those dead sea people got me too, right around christmas. I almost had a full-fledged bout with depression because that stuff, while it does exactly what they say it does, is totally not worth all that money. Come on. You know you're never going to use it. Where did I put my kit anyway?

Crankyputz said...

GC: So far I've used it everyday..Ok so its only been two days,....but its smashing I tell you (this is my way of trying to convince myself that it was worth the money)

The OE said...

Would it be worse to be not coveted but shunned?

Gela said...

One o' those same dead-sea-nail-buffer-people ambushed me in wheaton mall, buffed the nail on one of my fingers to shiny perfection and when she was finished I told her thank you but no thanks. So how comes everyone got tour invitation 'cept me? Now, I'm happy I didn't buy *huff&puff*

Oh, I'm always lusting after those borderline adults. Ever since I dated that 25 yo a few years ago when I was 30, I've had new appreciation for the youthful ones ;)

Bush Babee said...

I'm actually in the training and development world and as you know, cutting someone down in front of their peers is a skill within its.

Crankyputz said...

Gela, u didn't get the tour invite, SHAME. No worries next time ure at the mall, they shall get ya!

BB: It is a skill that should be cultivated with tender care...

sickpuppy3650 said...

Dead Sea materials? You mean salt?

Trouble said...

Eh? That was me last comment...

Crankyputz said...

Trouble: Had to be you...salt...smart A$$ its red salt....