Thursday, July 10, 2008

My Wednesday Night Cultural Experience

Last night was S birthday….Happy Birthday S.

After the ladies dropped me off, I got an invitation from the one whom we do not speak off. He is throwing a bachelor party on Friday and wanted me to go with him to choose the entertainment for the night. I was properly offended for a minute, and then realizing that I had never been to such clubs before thought it would be a good cultural experience. Here are my observations:

These women are perfect. And they can rum roll their body like chicks from Cirque de Solei. Amazing stuff, I totally get the male fascination. None of them had any cellulite.

Apparently they all buy the same string black thong in bulk. It was like their uniform.

There were some good looking men. Are strip joints the new library? (Just a joke, no need to get your panties in a twist)

The girls were charging $400 an hour for their services at the bachelor party. My CEO doesn’t make $400 an hour. Perhaps the real reason woman don’t like strip clubs is because it offends us that we’re doing all that stuff for free, and apparently we could use some practice. (Yes Yes we are morally superior and all that or so we think.)

When it comes down to it, a strip club is manly business, and a woman has no need to be there for the festivities. I got no jollies watching my non man staring intently at these gorgeous naked women. Not so perfect body withstanding, I want my man to always be staring intently at me, and if he needs to stare intently at someone else, he should do it on his own time. God invented secrets for a reason.

I expected more flare from the shows. Secretly I was a little disappointed by the whole thing. People were barely clapping.

Cue: I'm in Love with A Dancer

21 comments:

Pepper said...

lol

well the strip joints i have been too the women have flaws so i wasnt too self conscious...

but when LB went to one and text me bout how bad the stripper was and how he jus has to get a lapdance from her, i was not enthused...i think i agree with u bout the secrets....

Mighty Afroditee said...

I think that you went to a high class 'Gentleman's club', and not one of the gritty (feel like rhyming here, but I shall refrain) grass-roots clubs.

Have always thought about the girls who do that to put themselves through college and what not, and its...interesting.

So much to say on this one, so little space...

Tee hee..you say they never even clapped...? LOL!!!

GC said...

um
I'm still wondering why you were invited
doesn't this individual have any male friends?
this reminds me of that motel incident

owen said...

@GC cranky is one of the boys. she is not the type to try and cover up her insecurities with lies and pretentiousness.

Crankyputz said...

Go Owen!

Lady Afro: Your the diva with the ryhmes, its what we love about you, so rhyme away...

Jdid said...

no flaws? clearly you'll have to let a brother know where such creatures can be found.

400 dollars an hour wow! i see now why there were none at my bachelor party

Bella Noire said...

not to be crass or anything but I think the only thing thats supposed to be clapping is the bootie?...

And oddly enuff I seem to see a turn where there are ALOT of females in strip club these days....

Christie said...

I'm so glad my husband doesn't like those places. I think I would feel like I was being compared when he got home.

dalia said...

i always said if i had the boobs, i'd do it. charge $400-plus to shake what my mama gave me? why not?

Stunner said...

Yay for strip clubs and hot strippers!!!

minijonb said...

what?!? you went yo a strip club and didn't bring back any pix for your readers!?! i'm sooo upset.

= : - )

mad bull said...

Minijonb is spot on! I am shocked at this selfish behavior from you ;)

Actually, I have been to several clubs where the women were perfect, and I am glad that you totally understand the whole male fascination with this.

Trouble said...

My lawyer has advised me not to comment...

SimplEnigma said...

This is gonna sound strange, but I like going to strip clubs with my guy friends. The women are hot, and I'm always intrigued by women who can get up there despite bloating, PMS and just general off days and still bare their bodies for all to see. There are some days I don't even wanna look in the mirror cause I feel so bloated.

Here's the weird part: not into dudes whoa are into strip clubs. At all. It's a turnoff. Also not into male strip clubs. I find that the dudes are waaay nastier. Ugh.

GC said...

@owen
yes, she is one of the boys
but what kind of boys?
sometimes people say they aren't interested because they really aren't
if a guy feels smarmy and disgusted about going to a strip club is he lying and insecure?

Crankyputz said...

GC: I am assuming your delving into my psyche here.

I was given the option for this cultural experience, hence the difference between the motel 6 bit.

I think I've been pretty honest about the event, interesting to have been exposed to it, but not something I care for,

Also I don't think not wanting to see gorgeous women rum roll around the place, makes me insecure. Heck i can rum roll with the best of them harty har har.....

Crankyputz said...

Oh and Dahalia, boobage size didn't seem to be an issue, afterall the tastes are varied, from the largest to the smallest, there was someone to appreciate them all.

owen said...

according to Obesio its the quality of the nipple and not the size of the breast that counts

Crankyputz said...

And Obesio would know, but what say you owen, is it the color or the shape that matters most?

GC said...

@CP
no, not YOUR psyche---note my comment to you was taken very strongly by someone else who thought they would delve into MY pscyhe--which makes me wonder just what's in theirs? Sometimes a cigar. . .

Just because I thought it an insult for a man to invite a woman to such a place does not mean I am insecure, lying, or pretentious

And I still consider it an insult.

owen said...

It varies from case to case. I'd have to see then to make an educated guess