Friday, October 31, 2008

And the Results!

What is it about annual condo meetings that make them so boring? Is it the property manager, who looks a little too much like a used car sales man with his tired looking sports coat, or the lawyer, spitting out his legal jargon authoritatively to the uneducated onlookers, or the millions of questions the owners ask about the most mundane daily occurrences?

Wednesday night I am, sitting quietly amongst the sea of elderly and like a good politician, smiling a thoothy smile all over the room, when my eyes wander over to a group of little ole things, sitting in the corner on the couch.

I flash my pearly whites and in return I get the dirtiest looks. Puzzled, I try again, brighter, happier, really the best smile I have ever mustered….and again nothing.

As the evening progresses, I am invited to stand up and say a few words. Modeling myself after Obama, I say, “Folks, we know that hard times lay ahead of us, but I want to let you know, I will work for you….” At the end of my speech, there is cheering, I hear someone say loudly, “wow so young and so well spoken,” the cleaner lady exclaims, “Preeetie Girl,” and as I am putting my behind back into the chair, I notice a frail ole thing in the middle of the couch, rise up… is my arch nemesis….Dorothy

I plaster my best Obama smile, as she begins with “Young Lady, I want to ask you a question, Last year you had a party….”

Sadly Dorothy was unable to continue. The entire room erupted into commotion, and everyone began yelling at the poor thing, to shut up, to leave the poor young girl alone, telling her she was the reason young people didn’t attend, and so on.

It got so bad that Dorothy ended up leaving in quite a huff.

As she was stalking out, she attempted to slam the door to show here irritation.

Trouble was she couldn’t get the door open.

Graciously I opened the door for her, and as she stalked out she says, “I’ll be watching you.”

Ladies and Gentleman, here lies another perfect example of well functioning democracy.


Jumbie said...

With the last statement you remind me of Pa-trick and the smoothness he operates. (^_^)

Shall we expect big things of you?

Radmila said...

...and so?

Are you in?

I am assuming you are.

Jdid said...

hilarious! wish i had been there. way to go!

wait til i tell dorothy about your blog though

can you say impeachment :-)

Crankyputz said...

Im in Rad! Im in!

Pepper said...

lol what r the benefits?

SimplEnigma said...

Bwaaahhaaaaa. Hilarious. I miss you, CP. Financial crisis is kicking my arse...:(

Abeni said...

lol,go girl

Stunner said...

Excellent! Serves her right!

Marika said...

She'll be *watching* you?! WTF? Maybe you should steal her glasses, then if she can't see you, she can't watch you...

Congratulations on your win!