Friday, October 12, 2007

SSB


Secret Single Behavior, The things you do when you’re all alone. Things you wouldn’t do if there was someone there watching you. SSB’s are comfort things we do in privacy of our own space, like….

~Picking our noses
~Letting out a little air in the middle of the night, then lifting the blanket to get a whiff
~Standing over the toilet to see what our leftovers from last night look like
~Obsessing about our pores in one of those magnifying mirrors
~Covering our face with the most hideous looking creams….
~Eating ice cream at two am…or in my case an entire chicken pie
~Watching your favorite DVD over and over
~Folding your underwear a certain way
~Talking to yourself whilst watching TV and then answering yourself….going as far as to giggle at the joke you made…
~Sleeping diagonally on the bed….

I am planning on embracing my SSB’s this weekend.

Cuz I got a gift when I got home from Vegas.

I got a Tobi.

I am going to steam the hell out of my clothes this weekend…….clothes, underwear, the sexy little negligee I’ve been saving that’s all crumpled…..

Will you be entertaining any of your SSBs this weekend?

13 comments:

Christie said...

I don't know if I've just been married for to long or what, but I do that stuff even with my husband standing over my shoulder. I still don't pee with the door open or pass gas in front of him, though.

Miz JJ said...

I always eat the first bite of whatever I have made standing up in the kitchen. Even if I set the table for one I need to have the first bite standing up in the kitchen. It's weird, but I find it soothing.

Grant Miller said...

Congratulations on your Tobi.

Melody said...

Marriage doesn't change that stuff much -- at least not after years have gone by. Have fun wid your SSBs.

The OE said...

I don't consider a 2 am Ben and Jerry's run to be a covert mission. Everything else is Top Secret for reasons of National security.

Abeni said...

nose picking is a very public thing these days.

Mad Bull said...

What Abeni says is so true... you know whats disgusting? When you are working with someone on a project or something and you have allowed them to drive on your PC and they pick at their noses and then type away as though nothing is wrong... Aaaggggghhhh! And it happens often too! Disgusting!

SimplEnigma said...

Hmm, maybe that's why I'm single cos I'm a firm believer in showing the real SE. My philosophy is that if dude can't handle the things that make me me then what's the point. (See "Take Me As I Am").

Stunner said...

I pick my nose if I want to...but I do wash my hand after though. And I don't have to lift the sheet to smell my wind lol! Have fun steaming away with your Tobi!

GC said...

OMG a Tobi
will your friends ever get a chance to hang out with you again?
I need that btw--maybe I can rent one for a minute. I washed and dried my comforter and it is wrinkled as heck.
I don't know what SSBs I do aside from being an incredibly messy person.

Marika said...

So...you use this thing INSTEAD of an iron?

I think my SSB behaviour MUST be ironing, because I barely seem to do that anymore (not that I'm coupled up). I have wrinkles that have 'ought to do with my age.

marangand said...

So no more longs days of ironing for you, with your tobi you can cut ironing time in half.....LOL...You need to tell us if the Tobi really works...you know all these nice looking gadgets that look so good on TV and when u used them, you don't quite have the same effect!!!
LOL about the SSB's, so true...

Crankyputz said...

It works it works....so its not as heavy duty as they make it look, but it works!!!!